Real Talk – Accountability

Posted: August 21, 2014 in Relationship
Tags: , , , , , ,




IF you can’t have a healthy mature conversation about it and read objectively then this post is not for you.


I have been holding this post because I had a video to go with it but i can’t locate the video so I decided to change the post. Just really to pose the question What happened to accountability?

Over the past three months we have watched Solange Knowles beat Jay-z on an elevator without any reason coming directly from the source. We heard people blame Jay-z and praise Solange no headlines depicting her as a domestic abuser or anything. IF the situation was reverse the headlines would have been “BIG Gangster Rapper beats on little sister in law” and we as a society would have decimated him.


On the other hand we have the Ray Rice situation where his fiance at the time admitted to striking him, there is no video of what happened with the exception of him dragging her out the elevator, this is his first offense on any kind, and no one has force her to take any responsibility yet they are calling for his head. His punishment has been probation, fine, 2 games suspension, a huge hit to his reputation, and public ridicule. In addition us as a society wants him to lose his job, family has no income, and have him leeching off the social services “YEAH THAT WILL TEACH HIM” really? would it?

So we don;t take the same situation with Solange? So a woman hitting  man like shes a dam man is OKAY? its fine? We will all teach our daughters to grown up and put their hands on a man and its okay to do that. I am from a place in time where if someone hits me hit them back, with that being said my mother drew a line and reminded me woman are not to be hit. The thing I want to image is situations if a man is trying to exit a room or a situation while a woman is attacking him physically does he have the right to at the minimum defend himself until he can remove himself? How far can a woman go before he is “allowed” to attach back and retaliate in an effort to defend himself? Should we let her stab a man or slice him before its ok? See I still believe hitting a woman is not the answer I will stand by that until i die, but i do believe if a man is leaving a room that poses danger to both sides let him go, if hes leaving the house let him go, standing in his way and continuing to berate him is not the answer.


Just the other day i watched a scene where a woman as fighting with clenched fist a man in the street and no one stepped in and stopped anything, people looked and even shook their head no one stepped in at all. So this is okay? or how about this widely circulating video, this guy did the best he could, he asked her many times to back away and leave and she kept antagonizing him. Then just literally attacked him and he got her off and removed himself. See for all the people looking at a Ray Rice situation this video represents what most men go through before it even gets tot he point his responding. A lot of men I have verbally talked to spoke on this as being an ongoing thing and for their woman to yell, point, spit, hit them for up to 3 hours in some cases, so can you see yourself going through this for three hours with no exit without snapping? So this IS what Stephen A Smith was hinting to with the statement about provoking and this is where I am going with accountability. I hold men accountable for putting there hands on a woman, but shouldn’t she be held accountable for the same? Shouldn;t the same level of seriousness be held for a woman committing this crime as a man? Its not a man is called a punk fr not “putting the woman in check” or even reporting the crime.

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